Stop being morons
by PettyPenguin
Summary: The marauders fifth year of hogwarts. No ships, just their friendship. Give it a shot. (strong language)


1 September 1975

"For fucks sake James, just stop being such an ass." Said Remus nonchalant while reading on the Hogwarts express.

"In general… or something specific..?" James asked like he was in a meeting.

"In general." Sirius nodded with his classic grin.

"No, you idiot. Evans. And Snape for that sake."

"He deserves it." James muttered.

"This is why she isn't your girlfriend." Peter found.

"No, it isn't." Sirius looked chocked at Peter. "It's because she knows that she could get an actual decent guy." The rest of the group nodded except James.

"What?! I'm a decent guy! I'm a fantastic guy!" Remus and Peter laughed.

"The only thing that's true in that sentence is that you are a guy." Said Sirius and Peter laughed even more. Remus made an input:

"And that's just barely, we've seen you." James kicked Remus leg and Sirius accidentally falls of his seat from laughter. This wasn't the best for Sirius because the express lady smacked open the door.

"Seriously? On the floor?" She looked questioning.

"Almost right. Sirius on the floor." Sirius said with a grin.

"Anything sweet for you boys?" She smiled at them.

"No thanks, we are good." Peter said politely.

"Okidoki" She turned around and kept going.

"Hey! I wanted chocolate." Remus looked offended on a personal level.

"Chocolate hunt it is!" Sirius jumped up, he had a little cut on his nose from the fall. He ran out screaming after chocolate.

"Lady! Chocolate! I need chocolate! Emergency!" he came back a few minutes later with two chocolate frogs.

"You're the best Sirius!" Remus looked at the frogs and smiled. He had finally put down his book and was fully concentrated on the frogs.

"Yeah. I know. When you mentioned it I realized that I really wanted chocolate. Potter! Move it!" James looked kind of confused but moved aside and Sirius decided to sit down right in front of Remus.

"Why did I move?"

"Why aren't you giving me the chocolate? This is pure torture!"

"This isn't torture." Sirius dramatically opened the frog and licked it before biting it's head of. "This is." He smiled with his mouth full of chocolate.

"That's just rude." Remus looked seriously sad.

-Later in the common room- 

"It feels good to be back." Sirius sat in front of the fireplace.

"Yeah, stress and being constantly surrounded by idiots. They give me a headache. Hooray."

"Oh, then you know how I feel. Just that my headache doesn't go away on our breaks." Remus said to James.

"Ouch… That doesn't sound good. Have you tried muggle-pills? They work sometimes." Peter looked worried at Remus.

"Oh god." Remus just sighed.

"Yes?" James looked proud that he grabbed the opportunity and Sirius looked kind of disappointed that he missed it.

"Why am I even friends with you morons?"

"Because we are adorable." Sirius said proudly.

"No, we're not." Peter inputed.

"Alright, I'm smoking hot. Thanks for noticing."

-2 am still in the common room-

"I have an actual plan to be awake tomorrow, so I'm going to bed now. Any of you guys coming or are you going to fail your classes before they even begun?" Remus started walking to the boys sleeping halls.

"I'm coming with you." Peter walked after.

"Yeah, I'm going to ruin Jamie a bit more."

"Jamie? Jamie! Fuck off."

"It's cute."

"I'm not cute. I'm badass. I'm a really cool dude." James said it deadly serious.

"Okey, okey. Say that again, but think of it as a big fat cat with a pink bow that said it."

"You're a idiot." James hit him on the shoulder and Sirius looked like it really hurt for a second.

"Ouch! I fell on that arm earlier on the train."

"You're overreacting, show me your arm. It probably didn't even show."

"Yeah… You're right…" Sirius looked away a bit ashamed.

"In hell I am. You never give up that easily if you aren't hiding anything." James started looking serious.

"I'm just tired and don't have the energy to argue."

"You are such a liar right now!" James started getting worried.

"Okey, sure." Sirius started unbuttoning his shirt and showed his shoulder, it was a big bruise on the upper arm.

"Ops, it left a little mark." James just stared at it in chock and Sirius fixed his shirt again.

"Spill it. What the hell?"

"I fell." Sirius shrugged nonchalant.

"My ass, you fell. Stop lying right to my face."

"I got into a fight with my cousin and she won. She kept hitting me." Sirius looked down while buttoning his shirt.

"Why didn't you just say so dumbass, I got worried and I'm not good with the sentimental crap."

"You aren't good with 'the sentimental crap' are you good with the normal crap or what?" Sirius got his normal grin back.

"We aren't talking about Snape right now. Seriously Sirius, don't lie to me."

"Sure, but I'm going to bed. Remus had a point."

"Remus always has a point, that annoying bastard."

"You gotta love him though."

"Yeah, as long as you don't say it."


End file.
